Harlem Death

My knuckles turned white as I gripped onto the steering wheel, remembering how they marched and chanted for freedom and “equal rights”, holding banners like they deserved to be placed on the same peddle stool as us white folk were on. I was beyond tempted to take down each and every one of them that walked passed me, all high and mighty, fists in the air and hope in their hearts. My fingers twitched on the trigger of my gun, but lucky for them my colleague stood beside me and reassured me there’ll be other times where we could get revenge, for now that was their moment.

It was bad enough and obvious that that nigger, Rev Brown, used black magic in order to win the vote to send his child to our schools, but now they demand for more? My blood still boils daily when I think about how a nigger has the opportunity to sit amongst my kind and learn the same information my children are learning. It’s an abomination. We all know their mentality isn’t strong enough to comprehend what the schools teach, that’s why they were under our control for so many years, because they needed our brains to help tell them how to function. But here there are now, ungrateful bastards, declaring for equal rights and the rights to vote, when did they feel they were the same as us?

I took a deep breath and controlled my anger, releasing my grip on the steering wheel. It was only a matter of time before God corrected this mistake that the devil obviously had committed and put America back into order. Because if God failed to return America to what it once was, we’d have to deal with more people like Malcolm X, who felt the need to speak for his people and demand for things like the rights to vote or equality, which he had no right in asking for. People like him would provide all of them with false hope that I didn’t have time or energy to shut down. I can already see it, all of them walking around like they own the streets, attempting to stand up against us because we haven’t taken the time to assert authority and fear over them.

Instead, now it’s my kids that come home with the same fear that they used to have in their eyes a few years ago. It’s my kids who look at me during dinner as though I failed doing my job as a father and as a police officer. It’s my duty to keep them safe and to keep those animals out of the public eye, but here I am, cruising through Harlem watching them chant for segregation to be abolished, walking into ‘only whites in’ entrances in order to prove a point.

Being in this part of town did nothing but fuel my anger, seeing them so frequently and not under the care of a white persons command, kept my frustrations at bay, so I decided that leaving would be the best. Not for myself, but for them, because the longer I stayed amongst them, the more tempted I felt to kill them all, to prove that they have no chance in succeeding in a society that is ruled by our kind. Just as I begun to leave Harlem, a boy rushes out in front of my car, causing me to slam on my breaks, jerking me hard against my chair. Instantly a sharp pain in my neck arose and I knew this anomaly of the world had given me a whiplash. I was already having a bad day and there stood a coloured boy watching me in awe as I rubbed the back of my neck as it ached in agony. Cursing quietly, I opened my door and rolled my neck back and forth, in attempt to ease the pain, whilst walking towards the boy.

 

“I’m so sorry, I wasn’t looking!”

“Shut your damn mouth.” I rubbed my neck, making sure the pain wasn’t too severe then focused on the boy.

“I was in a rush to catch the bus, that I wasn’t focusing on the road, so I didn’t see you.”

“I said shut your mouth, I didn’t ask for a explanation. Where are you coming from nigger?” His face grew tight after hearing the word ‘nigger’, but he seemed smart enough not to react to it. He shifted from one leg to the other, never breaking eye contact with me.

“From school sir.”

“Oh you’re one of those ones. You think you can handle me right?”

“No sir.”

“Well you’re looking at me like you want to hit me?”

“That’s incorrect sir.”

“So you’re telling me I’m lying?” The coloured boy kept quiet and lowered his gaze to his shoes. This is what my duty was, to enforce fear into his kind, so that they knew their place in society.

“Sorry sir.”

“Where’s the evidence that you’ve just come from school?” The boy slowly reached in his pocket, making me draw for my weapon. I wasn’t going to take any chances, knowing how those people worked, they’ll act like they are going to co-operate and before you know it, your body is laying on the floor covered in blood. As soon as he saw my gun, he stopped moving and put his hands in the air.

“I didn’t tell you to stop, show me some identification that you came from school.”

“But sir, you’ve drawn your weapon.”

“I won’t tell you again nigger, show me some identification or I’ll be forced to take you to the precinct.”

The boy’s hand visibly shook as it moved closer to his back pocket, whilst my fingers twitched on the trigger of the gun. As soon as he’d grabbed something out of his pocket, I shouted in my radio, ‘I have a suspect reaching for a weapon.’ And the pulled the trigger. His body lifelessly dropped to the ground, whilst his registration card lay a few inches away from his body. I put my gun back in my holster and stood closer to the coloured body feeling no remorse, as his body lay limp on the ground, other than joy. I looked around, wondering whether anyone else had witnessed the scene, but there was no one around. I made sure I didn’t stand close enough so that my shoes were in his blood, but I couldn’t help but smile at the fact that I knew in my heart that, I had managed to get one less nigger off the streets. I felt as though I had done my duty, my kids were safe. My fellow white folks were safe. That was all I wanted for my kind, for them to be safe and have no fear that their lives were in danger – and as the thick crimson blood slowly began creeping towards the tip of my black leather boots I knew that as long as more blood was drawn, the world was going to be a better place.

 

 

 

 

Author’s Note:

 

As a young black female, I tend to see a lot of videos posted on my Facebook wall about how the world has become more abusive to a selective group. And for what reason? Because of the colour of their skin? Or their religion? I’m a Christian and one thing I believe in is freewill and it utterly disgusts me when I see people mistreated, verbally/physically abused and alienated by something that should not be a issue in the first place.
I’ve been trying for a while to write stories that reflected the hurt that I see when I watch these videos of people being shot for no reason, or for kids being bullied due to their religion and weirdly enough I find it difficult. Harlem Death was something I wrote a few months ago but didn’t post because I wasn’t too sure how people were going to take it. But I do hope that people see the irrationality from the narrator of this story and hopefully dislike him as much as I did as I was writing him up.

 

Thank you for reading!

 

Sarah E. Balogun

Toxic – Part 5

Josh hadn’t spoken to me for the rest of the time we were at the house. Avoiding my touch, my gaze and any interaction with me. It hurt, but I was aware of what I had done the night before and forced any type of pity deep within myself. We drove to his parent house in silence, not in the radio could drown out the awkward tension between us. I could tell Josh didn’t believe everything I had said to him back at the house, but the mere thought that his wife could have slept with her best friend or his brother was probably too much to bare, so silence was his only option.

He’d wore a nice grey snug knitted jumper, with dark black jeans and dessert boots. I’d worn a presentable dress, that came to down to my calves and plain black ballerinas. My intention was not to stand out this evening, my plan was to be as invisible as possible. Say my ‘hi’s’ and remain as quiet as possible, I had already made a fool of myself today, there was no need for me to do anymore.
Josh had parked outside of his parents home and took a deep breath. He looked at me as if wanting to say something but thought better of it, he turned his gaze away from me and proceeded to get out of the car, without saying a word to me. Tears welled up in my eyes, but knowing I didn’t have the right or time to be emotional, I wiped the strayed tears that had fallen out of my eyes and composed myself.

I stepped out of the car and waited for Josh to lock it before following his lead. Before we’d gotten to the door, Josh had grabbed my hand with such force that it hurt. There was no affection in the way he took my hand, if anything the force of his hand crushed into my wedding ring finger, which pressed into my other fingers, squeezing them tightly till they rubbed on each other, rubbing onto the bone. With a little wince, he knocked on the door and before a second went by, the door swung open and there stood his sister, Anabelle.

“Joshie!”
Josh threw my hand backwards as he embraced his younger sister. Ana was only 23 and was one of my bridesmaid at me and Josh’s wedding. She always seemed to make me laugh and understand me in a way that always shrouded her true age – almost making her a chameleon to anyone she came into contact with.
“Anabelle, how you been?”
He swung her around lovingly.
“Great! Hi Sash!”
She jumped off of her older brother and gave me a tight squeeze. She stepped back and allowed us to enter. The house was modern. Wooden floor boards surrounded by cream walls with family photos hung chronologically on the wall gave the house the ambience of love and warmth. It was what defined it from a standard house to a loving home. We entered the living room, and out bursted a room full of people. Young and old, everyone sat mingling with each other.

“Josh how have you been?”
His mother kissed his cheek twice affectionately whilst his father made his way to me, giving me a bear hug.
“Good to see the lovely Mrs Fletcher again.”
With a tight lipped smile, I hug his mother who welcomes me just as warm as her husband. For a long time after our little greeting with Josh’s parents, I simply follow Josh. I watch him greet his family that he hasn’t seen in a long time and others he barely recognises. Soon it’s dinner and we’re all packed around his dining table that has been extended, so that everyone is able to have a seat. I sit between Josh and Anabelle, and find myself staring at the empty plate on the table in front of me because it seems Josh has, when possible, ignored me and placed all his attention on his family at each opportunity given to him. The door bell rings and Anabelle rushes to open the door. Moments later, we’re all welcomed by the sight of Mike, who has managed to find my gaze before anyone else’s.

Stood confidently at the doorway of the kitchen, wearing a plain white shirt, tight enough to show off his physique with smart black trousers, sends images of my hands trailing over his chest the night before. I looked back at the empty plate before me whilst Mike walked round greeting everyone. I tried to ignore the tingle I felt deep within myself, but the closer Mike was getting to me, the more I felt my heart race and my legs tightened shut together. I felt Josh’s chair scrape out as he rose to hug his brother. They both gave each other a firm pat on the back, which didn’t last enough for me to compose myself. So I decided staying seated was my best option. Mike bent down to hug me, wrapping his strong arm around my neck as our cheeks touched each other briefly – but enough to spark a flame within me. I made sure my face didn’t replicate the feelings I felt within me, the tension that was becoming almost too much for me to bare, the way in which my insides had tightened to a tight ball waiting for Mike’s touch to unravel it. I took a deep breath as his arm unwrapped from my neck and he moved to the next family relative.

“Oh Mike why don’t you sit next to mum!”
Anabelle offered as there was no other available seat apart from the one opposite my seat. Mike was going to decline, but when he realised he had no option, he gave Anabelle a small smile and pulled the seat beside his mother out and took his position. I looked back at the only place I seemed to have found solace today, wishing I was anywhere but here when Josh randomly reached for my hand and this time, with more care, started to caress my skin gently, ever so slightly rolling his finger across my wedding ring as he watched Mike greet his father.

© All Rights Reserved by Sarah E. Balogun

Toxic – Part 4

“What’s wrong baby, did someone hurt you?”
Why did men think all signs of emotion from women meant we were hurt? It was me who has caused pain, if only Josh knew, I’m sure his anger would dissipate. I shake my head, throwing tears left and right.
“Then why are you crying?”

I took a deep breath, in attempt to inhale the overflowing emotions that threatened to show itself.
“I just…I’m sorry.” Sorry for going out yesterday, sorry for making him scared and definitely sorry for being intimate with his brother – all the things I wanted to say but kept it trapped within the deepest depths within myself.
“Sasha…what happened last night? Where were you?”
God, here it comes. The fabricated truth, the story smeared with hazy lies. I fear to look him in the eyes, so I keep my gaze to our feet and take a deep breath in.

“I drank too much,” Lie. “Then I saw Mike,” Truth. “I’m not sure how, but he was worried…I think.” More lies. “So he took me home and then I woke up this morning embarrassed and left to go home.” It was more or less what had happened. The bare outlines of yesterdays events. I look at Josh through my wet eyelashes and see the concern in his facial expression.
“Why didn’t you go home with Clarissa?” It was then I remembered Clarissa had lied I was with her. I needed to explain why Clarissa would have lied without mentioning that I was aware I knew she tried to make an excuse for me.
“I think I wondered away from the group a little…”
“WHAT THE FUCK WAS YOU THINKING?!”
His outburst made me jump. I didn’t expect this from Josh. I couldn’t put my finger on what it was that I had said that had caused his reaction.
“Sasha you’re acting stupid! I knew Clarissa was bad influence – what if Mike wasn’t there to help you?”
My lip trembled as I couldn’t quite fathom a response. I had been more than stupid – in fact I had been out right brain dead. But I was prepared to take stupid over him knowing how the truth.
“Never, you’re never going out with her again!” Something bubbled in me, who was Josh to tell me who I could and couldn’t see.
“She’s my best friend!” I said through tears, from both sadness and a slight hint of anger.
“I don’t care Sasha! What if something happened to you?”
“Nothing –”
“Wait,” He interrupted me, looking at me like something didn’t add up. “When did you drink that you’re that out of your mind that you can’t even get yourself home?”

I shrugged, not having the brain power to think of a response. I wiped my tears with the back of my hand and internally told myself to control my emotions. Stop the tears that continued to be rebellious and show itself even though I fought so hard to keep them at bay. Stop trying to defend Clarissa, there was a time and place that I would be able to bring justice to Clarissa’s name and today was not the day. For now, I just needed to accept that I was wrong and then clear the grey areas at a later stage.

“Something’s not right Sasha, why didn’t Mike let me know you were with him?” Because we were fucking on the floor and then on his couch and then literally on every appliance until we reached his bedroom. My insides flare up with small voices reminding me how good it was with Mike. How he made me scream, how I grabbed him with passion leaving scratch marks on his body as he plunged deeper and deeper. God, the thoughts were so real, I could feel myself tensing up. My core tightening and slowly getting moist as I thought about our passion.
“I was scared you’d be upset, I was a mess.”
My voice came out huskier than necessary – thicker almost with Mike still on my tongue. Just as Josh was about to say more, his phone rang, pausing him in his tracks. He gave me another glare and reached for his phone.
“Mike…” My eyes dropped to the ground, what if our lies hadn’t matched? We didn’t thoroughly think this through. I looked back at Josh who had me under strict scrutiny whilst speaking to Mike. “Yeah she’s home safe…thanks for your help Mike…fuck I forgot about that. We’ll see you at mums.”

The phone was off. He gave me one last look and then left. But before he was out of ear reach he shouted, “It’s my grandfathers anniversary, we’re going to my parents. Get cleaned up.”
I rushed to the shower and took a long bath. I thought things were already difficult, but now we had to play happy family in front of his actual family was not ideal or even part of the plan. This was going to be one extended evening.

© All Rights Reserved by Sarah E. Balogun

Toxic – Part 3

Throughout my journey home I can’t help but question who I really am, who’ve I become? It was bead enough that I had thought about cheating on my husband on multiple occasions, but the fact that I had actually committed the act almost left me bewildered. Who was the woman that sat in the black cab, wearing a body con on a early Saturday morning? Because I sure as hell knew it couldn’t have been myself… I risked my marriage for what? A night that I probably wouldn’t forget for the rest of my life, it sounds exciting when I think about it, but was it truly worth it?

I should have thought about my actions in more depth. Even though I’ve felt like this for a year, I’m not sure if I had truly contemplated the aftermath if I had went ahead and actually slept with Mike. I’m not even sure why now, sitting silently in the back seat of the cab driving me to where I thought was home, but sounds weird to call home now is where I contemplate my actions. I knew what I was doing yesterday – I could hardly blame it on the alcohol, I barely drank any. And even if I drank a cup or two…or the whole bottle, I knew what I wanted from the start, the way Mike had touched me in the club and even more so when our lips touched was enough to remind me that I knew exactly what I was doing.

My conscious was beyond clear at that point, maybe if I was intoxicated it would be a better pill to swallow, rather than having the guilt slowly choke and suffocate me silently in the back of the cab. Before I had even knew what I was doing, I asked the cab driver to stop and requested to walk the rest of the way. I paid him the fare and got out of the vehicle, clutching myself tightly as the cold London air blew wildly on my bare legs and in my short outfit, more suitable for 7PM than 7AM. I ignored the quizzical stares that Londoners couldn’t help but do and hugged my body as I walked home. Getting some air should help me think.

I needed to plan how I was going to approach Josh. What I was going to say, in which way would I say it and whether he would believe me or not. The lie Mike had told me to stick to sounded ridiculous. Far too close to the truth for me to remain settled, but the more I thought about other lies that could replace Mike’s one, I realised why Mike had wanted me to stick to his own lie. The guilt from cheating and the hint of truth would make it more believable to Josh and with Mike as a sturdy alibi – Josh would know I was telling the truth.

I cannot believe I have come to this. Thinking of ways to lie to my husband to get away with infidelity. Where was the determined and strong woman who knew exactly what she was doing the night before? Because if she could show herself now, then maybe confronting my husband wouldn’t feel as hard as it did now. I wasn’t strong enough for this, even as I think back to Mike, back to the night we shared, I can’t help but shudder. Thoughts of us constantly replaying in my head as I ponder when the next time will come…hoping it would be sooner rather than later.

But what was done was done, right? The damage has been created and it was now sealed. I was a fragile glass yesterday that shattered under Mike’s touch – my only hope now was that the cracks that were more than evident didn’t reveal themselves to Josh.
I was coming up to the house now. 17…15…13, the more steps I took the more my heart crashed into my chest. I have never feared my husband – never needed a reason to, but today the fear that resided in me, was wrapped around me like another layer of skin. It wasn’t welcoming, but I was aware I gave it room yesterday to take place in my body.

Sucking in my breather, I open my white wooden gate, wishing I was returning with a clear mind. But after having spent the night with Mike, my mind was far from clear. Even now, when I remember how our lips touched in the club makes my libido dance in excitement. God even thoughts of him can spark me to life, even in such situations as the one I was in currently. Before I get to open the door, Josh has it opened. Rushing to me like a mother reunited with their abducted child. He hugs me tightly, too tight and very one sided. I think because I’m too stunned to move my arms left alone my body, I am left in a one-sided embrace. He stands back to watch me and then draws me inside the house.

Walking in silence, my breath comes out shorter, he faces me again and embraces me once more. This time with less worry but with more love. It was then I realised I was a horrible human being, weak and selfish. My husband stood in front of me, me in his arms, his breaths coming out in short rapid spurts, and I can tell he is happy to see me safe. And there I stand, arms planted to the sides of my body, scared that if I touch Josh, I’d ruin him like I have done so with this marriage. I feared tainting him but was too emotional to pull away. That was when I found myself in tears, a flood of emotions rushing out of my chest before I could stop it.

What had I done? Was it truly worth it? Could I just erase such mistakes from reality and act as though none of it occurred – was that a possibility? Because if it was I was ready to do anything to undo my mistake and go back to the woman I was only just a few hours ago.

 

© All Rights Reserved by Sarah E. Balogun

Toxic – Part 2

The sun had crept through the bedroom curtains and had teased my eyes awake. At first I was still in a dream-like state. Enjoying the warmth of the bed and the sun both massaging my body, pulling me back to sleep. Until my phone vibrated and with each vibration I was taken away from this bliss and was forced awake. At first I thought I was at home, laying next to my husband – but when I begun to remember the events of last night, I was mistaken.

It wasn’t my husband that had thrown me against the wall and had ripped my clothes off once we were out of the cab. Neither was it my husband who had me open and craving for more. Images of my husbands face flashed in my mind as I arched my back in ecstasy and when I had reached my climax for the third time. Yet, the more I thought about the night before, the more my husbands face morphed into someone else. Someone who has invaded my dreams, my thoughts – my life.

At first it feels too much like I’m still in a dream. Like soon enough I’m going to awake and  find my husband laying too close beside me. But after a few minutes, I don’t awake from what feels like a dream and when I dare to look at who is laying behind me, reality rushes back to me so hard my stomach begins to roll.

I’d cheated on my husband. It wasn’t as though I had forgotten, it was all in my face. The room I had woken up in was not mine. The dark curtains were key, yet I still chose to believe it was a dream. But now seeing Mike lay peacefully beside me, is enough to remind me of what I had done the night before. What was I to do? My phone vibrated for another time, stirring Mike awake.

It took him a while before he was awake enough to notice me. But once he did his arm slithered around my waist, pulling me closer to him. Even though I was aware of what I had done and guilt was starting to sing in my mind, my body tingled to his touch. Trembling in his embrace, my inner demons still having power to make me crave what I knew I shouldn’t, whilst my conscious was thinking about my husband at home. It must be him that was calling. Wondering where I have been throughout the night – if only he knew I was with someone he trusted, someone he thought would keep me safe.

Mike smelt me as I tried to decide what I was going to do next – stay and lay within this microcosm that seems too good to be true or run back to my husband and act as though none of this occurred.
“I love your scent.”
Without thinking, my body leaned back into his touch, so our bodies were as one. I felt his hard-on, making a small smile creep onto my lips. I guess no matter the logic that seemed so obvious to me, my inner demons decided what I did when it came to Mike.
“Thank you.” He had slowly begun grinding his hips into mine, using his left knee to separate my legs, allowing his access to become more easier.
“I’ve dreamt about this for a long time Sasha.” He was now between my legs. My thighs trembled as I knew what was to come soon. His hand danced on my skin and then made its way to where needed his touch the most, when my phone had begun vibrating again. My eyes shot open to where the vibration was coming from.
“Leave it.”

And I was sure that I would have left it, until it began vibrating again. I knew who was calling, and it was bad enough that I had cheated on him with his brother, but to make him worry was not something I intentionally wanted to do. Peeling myself away from Mike, I tried to find the phone that was still vibrating. Where was it? In my jacket pocket? Or did I take it out of my clutch bag? Before I had the chance to get off the bed, Mike had grabbed onto my hand, stopping me from moving.
“I need to get it Mike, we both know who it is.”
I made another attempt to get my phone, when Mike’s grip tightened.
“I know it’s him Sasha, but I don’t care. I just want you. Let’s enjoy this once more before we have to think about the consequences.”
It was stupid, I knew how dumb his suggestion was and how I know I had done more than enough damage, but I didn’t want to think. I just wanted to be in Mike’s arms again before I had to face reality. I had to choose, between the vibrating phone or being taken to new heights once more, before the guilt suffocated me and would slowly break me down and tear me from the insides out.

I let Mike crawl towards me, and take me again. Take me away from everything. It wasn’t as though my relationship…or marriage for that matter was in shambles. Josh and I were in a good place. It just was not as good as I wanted it to be. I wasn’t too sure what was missing, but when I laid my eyes of Mike at our wedding I hadn’t noticed it then. I was so drunk on love, I couldn’t see the way he held me too tight as we danced on the wedding night as a polite gesture from him to me. Neither did I see the other times he would linger around in my house for too long after guests had gone, a few months after me and Josh had moved in together. However, after three years I was no longer drunk on love – I was enjoying it with a more  sober mind. But that opened my eyes to Mike. To how he watched me, how when we hugged his hand lingered very close to my bum. And instead of these things to make me feel awkward or at least tell my husband, I enjoyed it. Enjoyed the thrill, the feeling of having another mans hands over my body. And not just any man, my husbands brother.

That was when I realised that my marriage was not enough. Josh was an amazing man, great at sex, was romantic and treated me perfectly. Yes, we argued but that was normal. But he no longer had the hunger in his eyes when he saw me walk through the door and neither I for him. Instead, I kept losing my breath when Mike and I were left alone together, when he tried to kiss me when my husband had gone to get us glasses to drink wine in. Or when we had been celebrating their parents anniversary, and Mike had managed to touch me inappropriately in a crowded area. I was sure that Josh had seen, but he didn’t mention anything and I heard nothing of it – so I tried to ignore it. But with the more passes Josh made on me, the more I felt for him.

So here I was, laying on my back. My mouth in an ‘o’ shape as Mike had now thrusted himself inside me for another time. Penetrating me in time of the vibration of my phone. He grabbed a handful of my breast as my back arched in pleasure as the strokes increased. With strength and speed, Mike continued to push me further and further to the edge. I knew it wasn’t long until I collapsed to his love, my eyes opened pleading with him to end it. He smiled as he continued to power through me, ignoring my plea and pushing himself to the brink before exploding. His whole body shaking in desire. Every muscle tensing as he tried to keep his body up above mine, whilst I crumbled below him. That was it, we had had our last fun in this world we had created for the night and now it was time to be true to ourselves.

I had a husband to confront and Mike had a brother he had just betrayed. After a few minutes of laying in silence, I sat up and went to hunt for my mobile. I didn’t put any clothes on as I had no need to hide something Mike had already seen more than enough in one night. I checked my jacket, yet couldn’t find anything. After looking for a few minutes, I found my clutch bag, which had my phone inside. I unlocked the phone and saw six missed calls from Josh and two from Clarissa. Then a few messages from both Clarissa and a few from a group conversation that I was in. I opened Josh’s message, which was frantic, he had called Clarissa and she claimed I was with her, but when failing to prove that I was there, he knew she was lying. He had started to get scared and also annoyed – the tone in his texts and voicemail had gotten a lot more serious. I needed to go home, before anything had gotten worse.

I turned back to Mike who was watching me.
“I have to go Mike.”
“I know, but I’ll see you again soon, just say you was with me when you speak to Mike. I found you a little too drunk and I took you here. I’ll come round later and explain it to him.”
“Are you crazy?”
“Trust me Sasha, say you are with me and I’ll handle everything.”
He stood up and came to me, pulling me close so that our naked bodies touched as he kissed me deeply. I was scared, but I wasn’t too sure what of. I don’t know if I was scared that Josh was going to wonder where I was, or whether this may be the last time I see Mike.
“God Sasha, if I had my way, you wouldn’t leave my side. But I know you have to go to Josh. Sasha…trust me, stick to what I said and we’ll be good.” I nodded nervously. He planted another kiss on my lips and helped me gather my things as I ran through the lie in my head. Well, it wasn’t even a lie, I did come home with Mike, but we did things I know Josh wouldn’t approve of. I just hoped my face didn’t have the events of yesterday night and this morning written all over it.

© All Rights Reserved by Sarah E. Balogun

Toxic – Part 1

Do you ever get that feeling when you know what is wrong, and you try so hard to stay away from that – but everything in life is pulling you closer to the wrong? No matter how many times I turn away from the temptation, or ignore the constant opportunities, the more I’ve faced with it, the more I feel myself growing weak. With each opportunity I pass, I feel myself opening up to the idea more and more.

I am a loyal woman, never been swayed by temptation (baring in mind I don’t get many temptations). But then he presented himself to me, and after all the pushing I did, it seemed as though I couldn’t push him no more. I knew in every part of my body that he was wrong, toxic for me. No one has ever made me question my marriage, no one has ever made me want more. Yet, here I was watching him, watch me from across the room whilst he sat with his friends.

It was a girls night out, I felt I needed the space – with my head clogged up with all this confusion, getting out and forgetting for one night didn’t seem like a bad plan. But here I was, thinking about him again. I didn’t know he’d be here. If I did, I sure as hell wouldn’t have come here, but he was and my girls were already ordering drinks. We located a table close to where he sat amongst his friends and drank.

It wasn’t as though I could drink, I needed a sober mind if I was going to be in the same room as him. I didn’t want to do anything that would jeopardise my marriage. My girls had started to take off their jackets and began dancing to the music of the club – me on the other hand sat still, battling with my inner demons. A quiet voice screaming at me to leave, but the demons caressing my muscles telling me to stay, no harm in watching and enticing yourself with something you’d never had and never will. My best friend Clarissa tugged on my shoulder, pulling me out of my deep thoughts and forced a glass of drink in my hand.

“Oi! Stop being so boring and drink!”

I hadn’t told Clarissa about Mike. There was nothing proud about my feelings about him to share, so I made sure I kept him hidden, like a dark secret you didn’t want anyone knowing about, yet was always in everyone’s face. I gave her a small smile and put the cup on the table.

“Sasha what are you doing! It is your night off for once, enjoy it – why are you sitting there like a prune?” She shouted over the music. I gave her another shrug and looked away from Mike who was watching our every move. She lifted the glass off of the table and forced them near my lips.
“You will drink Sasha! You are not going to be like this through the night – not on my watch.”

Before I could protest, she’d found an opening with my mouth and began pouring the drink, as I tried to lean away from her offer. She almost climbed on top of me to ensure the liquid went all the way down my throat. By now, not only was Mike, but his friends also had started to watch the show. The liquid burnt my throat as it intruded its way inside my body. As it slid it way to the bottom, small flames ignited on the inside of my body causing me to feel warmer than I had a few minutes ago. Clarissa was laughing now as my face grew tense with the burn that came with the drink. Her hand fell behind her and before I knew it, she was pressing another glass cup to my lips.

I shook my head furiously, trying to push her off of me, but failed as she had now taken seat on my laps and was begging me to drink.
“For me Sasha, please drink one more and then we can have some fun.”
I looked at her and then thought of Josh, my husband. He was never too fond of Clarissa, felt as though she was always pushing me to do things I never wanted to do. And he was never too sure what her sexuality was and for that fact, he never liked to leave me alone with her for too long. He always said he saw a look in her eyes that I never seemed to notice. But I could never vouch for that – me and Clarissa had been best friends for almost ten years, and within those years I had never thought she swung for the same team.

But as she pouted and came closer to me to make me drink, I saw a flash of who Josh had been seeing all those times ago. I opened my mouth to not only receive the drink but to drown the many voices in my head that were screaming far too many things at me. After the drink had disappeared, she wiped a drop that had escaped my lips and licked her finger. Smiling, she got off and walked to where our other friends were dancing.

Too embarrassed to look at Mike, I took my jacket off to busy my hands and stared directly at the table. He was still watching me – this time I’m sure he had a look of hunger in his eyes. It had only been a second that I looked at him, but I knew how this night was going to end. I had lost the will to fight against what my body craved for, what it thought would heal it. I took a deep breath and hoped he didn’t make his way to me, but I knew sooner or later there would be nothing stopping him, and he’d come and get what he truly wanted.

After a while, the girls returned from dancing and were all hyped. I had managed to drink a glass or two more and then watched them all chatter. Then one of Mike’s friend had approached us.
“Hello ladies.”
“OOOOooooOOOO, what can we do for you today?” Sasha said, giving him what I was sure was her most alluring face.
“Well me and my friends were getting a little bored and saw how much fun you were having and wanted to see if we could come and join you?”
“NO!” Was the voice that screamed in my head, yet my lips didn’t move in reality, instead, I watched as the girls eyed up the guys and invited them over. My heart thumped so hard in my chest, I wasn’t too sure if it was drink or the fear I had of knowing Mike was walking straight towards me – either way, I knew my heart could not slow down.

All the guys had paired themselves with a lady, others making a triplet as the women were more in numbers that the men. Mike sat close, too close to me. I tried to ignore the heat that radiated off of him as our skin brushed, but all it did was make me tingle – inside and out. Everyone chatted whilst me and Mike sat silently watching the party in front of us. Then before I was aware, Mike had grabbed my waist and pulled me closer to him. The minor touch did wonders too my body, I tried to block out what it made me feel, but who was I to fight something that seemed so inevitable.

“You smell beautiful tonight Sasha.” His face pressed against my neck, so close that as he spoke his lips gently slid across my skin. I bit my lip and prayed for something to intervene, even if it was a funny look from Clarissa, anything to make me know this was a bad idea. Yet, everyone was far too enticed with their own guy to notice me. I nodded my head in thanks and felt his breath on my neck. I tried not to lean into his touch, into his warmth, into what felt like home, but before I knew it, my eyes were closed and I had leaned my head on his to feel his hair caress my cheek. He chuckled and moved to my left ear.

“You’re not fighting me off no more?”
I looked at him, watched his face analyse mine and couldn’t help but touch him. His eyes closed as my fingers trailed little touches of flames onto his skin. He opened his eyes and stared at me waiting for an answer, waiting for me to allow him to have me. Somehow, I always thought it would be him that would take me as soon as he had the chance, but here he was giving me the power, asking me whether he had permission to have me. I tried to find ‘No’ in my mind, but all I could see was ‘Yes’ and there was still a little voice within me that was telling me not to do what I wanted to do so much. I took a deep breath and came close to his lips.
“I should be fighting you off, you’re no good for me.”
A wicked smile grew on his lips and he came closer to my lips that were parted ready for him to enter inside.
“I’m no good for you now?”
“No,” I said smiling. Who had I become? Entertaining the devils dance? Knowing what was right and what was wrong. Whoever told you you’re conscious drowns out when you’re tempted was lying. The closer our lips got together, the clearer I could hear my mind scream ‘no!’ – yet it was me now that had chosen it to shut up. I forced the rebellious screams deep inside a room within my head and locked the door, leaving just my desire and Mike alone. “You are no good, but I can’t fight you off anymore.”

As the words came out my mouth in a rush, his lips met mine in a hurry. His hunger seeped through his lips and onto my own. His arm that was wrapped around my waist, had now moved towards my bum, squeezing what he could, whilst my arms found their way around his neck. I heard screams and laughter, but I couldn’t seem to pull myself away from Mike. I slipped my hands between his legs, trying to get a feel of what I was sure to come later on tonight. He moved to my neck and growled at me.
“Don’t Sasha.”
Once I had found the bulge that I had dreamt about for nearly every night for a year, I couldn’t stop myself. Rubbing on it, trying to imagine the whole length, his hand stopped mine abruptly. He pulled away from me and looked at my face. My lips now plump from the kissing, my body now scorching hot from our intimacy, now sat vibrating waiting for him to make the next move. The voice that had been screaming no in my head, was now whispering no, whilst hoping he kissed me again. If my conscious wouldn’t fight against him, what chance did I have. My inner logic had now crumpled onto the floor clutching her legs shut whilst saying no, but wanting more.

He grabbed my hand and led me outside. It was only by a second that I had managed to grab my jacket and bag and left with Mike. No one was entirely sure where we were off too, I signalled the smoking area, but neither I or Mike smoked. But who was to question when they all probably witnessed their married friend kiss another man.

Once we were outside, Mike hauled a cab and gave them an address and before I knew it, we were inside sitting in silence, but our bodies screaming for so much more. I dared to look at Mike and see that look he had on his face that showed he was going to devour every inch of my body. His hand still clutched onto mine, with a pain that oozed with ecstasy. I knew he was hanging on by a thread and if the cab man hadn’t got us to where we needed to be, Mike would take me right here.

I looked at him slowly, and was taken back when our eyes met. There was no stopping us anymore. Even if I was starting to doubt my actions, there was no way Mike would let me go. I was about to cheat on my husband with his brother and no voice of reasoning was going to stop us.

© All Rights Reserved by Sarah E. Balogun

The Big Apple – Part 1

I stumbled into the cab, vision blurred and stability definitely gone. I wasn’t too sure whether Dara gave the driver my home address or her own, but all I was aware of was that she’d gotten in with me and the cabman was driving to our destination. I was beyond embarrassed, I’d only been working with Dara for two months and already she’s seeing a side that I wasn’t even aware lived within me. She pulled my lifeless body against her own and began stroking my hair. It soothed my spinning vision and mind, I didn’t know how I was going to make it up to her, but I knew the treatment she was giving me was going to cost me a week of late nights in the office, but at that precise moment I didn’t care.

I’d embarrassed myself in front of my co-workers and my boss, all I wanted was to bury my head dead within my pillows and let this nightmare be forgotten. I closed my eyes, feeling like a little girl again and remembering the last words my mother told me before I moved out to New York ‘make sure you look after yourself.’ And here I was, a shambles. The cab stopped after a few minutes, which seemed like hours to me. Dara and the driver exchanged some words and before I knew it, she was helping me out the cab.

“Mind your left leg, the curb is close.”

I clasped her hands tight, afraid my footing would fail me and I’d land face first into the ground. Once I was upright and out of the cab, she began walking me towards some stairs that led towards a tall building. It didn’t look anything like the apartment I was staying at, but I wasn’t confident enough to believe my own eyes, so I fumbled carelessly towards the entrance, with her grip firm on my waist. I opened my pouch, in attempt to find my keys when Dara stopped me.

“What are you doing?”

“We can’t get into my place without my keys Vic!” The last words came out as a burp, causing me to cover my mouth.

“Katy, we’re at my place.”

She opened the doors with her keys and walked me through the lobby and towards the elevator. I stumbled after every few seconds, only highlighting how drunk I seemed to have been. She pressed the elevator button, causing the doors to open. We walked in, waiting for the lift to take us to her place. I wonder why she took me here? Why didn’t she just drop me home and leave me there and what floor does she live on? I leaned on Dara, feeling tired and looked up to her.

“Why’d you take me here?”

She looked at me with what seemed like a confused stare, “what do you mean ‘here’?”

I threw my arms in the air and signalled the building she lives in, instead of the building I live in.

“I wasn’t going to leave you all drunk by yourself.”

The elevator doors opened just as she answered. She guided me to her door, unlocking it with her keys, revealing a dark corridor. She led me through the darkness to what seemed like the living room. She forced me to sit on the sofa and then left me. I couldn’t believe I was drunk and in my boss’ apartment. I closed my eyes and felt the soft velvet sofa under my fingertips. The tiny hairs soothed my skin, calling me to sleep. I kicked off my heels and curled up like a ball on the sofa, ready to get lost in the call of this velvet masterpiece, when the lights flickered on. I groaned in annoyance and sat back up, confused with why it’d suddenly gotten bright.

“Before you even dare to sleep, take this tablet and drink this water.”

I obeyed her command, not thinking twice to answer back. I place the small chalky white tablet in my mouth and then gulp the water, that I hadn’t know I’d been craving.

“Do you feel better?” She asked walking back to what I can only assume was the kitchen area.

“Why am I here Dara?” I said, looking at the light that shone opposite from where I sat.

“I told you that already Katy.”

I looked down trying to remember when she told me, but failed to remember anything passed the lights turning on and waking up from a blissful sleep I was sure to have.

“Oh sorry. Is this your place?”

The light in the kitchen turned off, turning the intensity of the light within the room down. She came out with a plate in her hand. She laid the plate on the table and sat beside me. I looked at the sandwich and my stomach flipped twice, I shut my eyes, trying to burn the image out of my head as it began making me sick.

“Yes, it is my place.”

“It’s beautiful.” She sat besides me and chuckled.

“Are you tired honey?”

I nodded, too tired to speak anymore, just wanting a bed and sheets to cover myself with. She helped me up and walked towards the bedroom. It was dark, but with the light from the living room, I was able to make out shapes from the silhouettes casted by the objects. There was a huge bed in the middle of the room, must have been double, maybe even king sized, with a few cabinets and wardrobes resting against the walls. What caught my attention was the huge window that oversaw the busy roads and buildings of New York. Little lights danced across the roads, whilst buildings stood affirm in the midst of the party of lights, like security guards. The lights started to blur ever so slightly the longer I looked at it, making my head feel dizzy. Dara must have been aware, because she pulled me towards the bed, but it was too late. The drink had finally settled and my limbs had gone to sleep, causing me to fall to the ground. She sighed and crouched down, so that we were face to face.

“You alright?” Another nod, replaced speech. She lifted me up for another time tonight and managed to get me into her bed. At first she tried to undress me, and I tried to fight her off. I was drunk, probably more than drunk. But I still had enough sense that this wasn’t a good look at all, rolling around intoxicated in her bed was bad enough, but having her unzip my dress and try and pull it off was another. What was worse was that even though I felt I was putting up a good fight in attempt to stop her, it was all futile. All she had to do was move my defensive hands with force and they never lifted again. This was definitely something I was going to regret in the morning. Once I was down to just my undies, I closed my eyes, letting the silk sheets caress my skin and drag me further into the sleep abyss that had been calling my name.

As I slowly drifted deeper into sleep, it was as though I felt Dara hover above me and watch me. I’m sure she even muttered a few indistinctive words, but after I groaned and kept saying sleep, I felt the duvet fall over my shoulders and two soft lips touch my forehead. Then I was gone.

Family Debt

 

I thought I’d handled the issue well. You see, I borrowed a couple thousands, but I had plans to regain the money and return it, it was meant to be a simple loan. Simple my ass. Because once a bitch named interest and her friend loan began working hand-in-hand, the couple thousands, started to accumulate. Thousands turned into more thousands, and if I didn’t pay up this week, it’d turn into a million. And who else to tell me this bitter sweet news other than my father. Ah! My good old father. The bastard who’d get a kick at praying on helpless women, and his own son, the bastard who’d steal money and then gamble it all away, leaving his “family” starving, the bastard who appeared in my office in the finest suit on Monday to tell me, with a smug smile that the company I owed this loan to was now his, and that the interest was increasing. The bastard, that not only crippled his child emotionally when he was 15 but was ready to cripple his child again, financially at 36.

I could still remember the way mother stared at me from time-to-time, looking at me like she hated me. Why? Because I was ‘blessed’, as what many women would refer to it as, with chestnut hair and dark brown eyes. The things that drew ladies closer made my mum stare at me like I was the one who’d given her the black eye, or swollen lip, or cuts and bruises on her body. I’d grown to hate him for what he did, what he made us. Dysfunctional.

I promised I wouldn’t let him win, she cried in my arms that night, and I promised, if ever there was a chance to prove my strength, my purpose, my protection towards my mother, I’d prove he won’t win; and I’ll be damned by God if I let him win again.

So let this shit begin.

 

The Explanation

He looked for his phone and noticed it was on the counter. He didn’t want to interrupt their meal together, but when he looked at her and realised how engulfed she was in her meal, he knew taking a quick second to text Max would be fine. Taking one last sip of his Koppaberg he pushed his chair out, making Kaitlin look up from her food in confusion.

‘I’ve just got someone to quickly contact.’ She smiled and he went on his business. She never questioned whether he had a girlfriend, not once had it come into her mind until now. She didn’t know much about this man, she didn’t know whether he was capable of cheating on a girlfriend, or a wife…however she didn’t notice a ring so she assumed if he had a partner, they were just at the first stages of their relationship. Things like this was what had her questioning what she truly wanted from this man, what was it exactly that she wanted from him? Did she just want the amazing sex? Because the sex was amazing, there was no lie about that; everything about that man (that she knew) was amazing. But, was it only the sex, or did she want more? Did she want a relationship…? All these questions had her frowning; it was too early to think about it. He suppressed those questions down again, he’d think about their future together when there was time, but right now he focused on getting a text to Max, before it would be he, that’d ruin he and Kaitlin’s erotic session. He turned on his phone and saw notifications pop up. Another text from Max, a text from her and another phone call from her. He focused on Max’s text and read it.

 

M8! I’m worried, u haven’t replied all day! R u okay? Jus text me back!’

 

He held his head and smiled. Max was a good friend, they weren’t as close as he was with his ‘ex-best friend’ but Max had been there and was still there. In all honesty he was surprised Max hadn’t come already – with his frantic texts it seems as though Max was on his way to his house to check if he hadn’t been kidnapped or killed.

 

Yes im alive. I haven’t picked up becos ive been busy. Don’t worry, I’d rather not go out tonite. & don’t worry – yes I have company…’

 

He thought about whether he should tell Max that he had company, and then thought the better of it – it was too soon, he didn’t even know what they were, before he had to start explaining to people what they were. He erased the last part and re-read the message.

 

‘Yes im alive. I haven’t picked up becos ive been busy. Don’t worry, I’d rather not go out tonite.’

 

He sent the message and then made his way back to the table, watching Kaitlin as he took his seat. He noticed the slight frown in her face; she hadn’t watched him take his seat, she’d remained focused on her Beef Chow Mein shifting the noodles from left to right.

‘What’s wrong?’ His voice startled her, all she’d thought about was what she was doing. What was she doing at his house? What was she doing sleeping with a man she barely knew? She shouldn’t have slept with him yesterday – that was bad enough. But what was bad was the fact that she’d continued this escapade with him. She needed to leave, after this make shift dinner she’d gather her clothes, which were balled up somewhere on the floor and leave…leave this façade.

‘Nothing.’ She stopped messing with the food and ran her fingers through her hair, he knew she had already began doubting herself but he didn’t know it’ll take this toll on her. He pushed his chair out and walked to her side. She still didn’t look at him as he bent down beside her, she couldn’t believe what she was doing, nothing he could say right now could change the way she felt.

‘You’re lying to me.’ He tried to grab her hand but she slowly drew into herself. He knew if he didn’t bring her out of this mood, she’d pick up her clothes and leave without any intention of coming back. He sighed and tried again. There was something about this woman that had him trying, never did he try this much, apart from his last girlfriend, but this woman was different. He knew that if he didn’t try, he could possibly lose this woman and that was something he didn’t want. ‘Kaitlin, look at me.’ She wasn’t going to look at him until he pulled her chin, so she could face him. She was confused, she didn’t want to leave this feeling this man gave to her, but she doubted whether this was a smart decision she was doing.

‘I…I just don’t know whether this,’ She motioned the two of them with her hands. ‘Is smart, for you and me. Like…what if you have a girlfriend, I don’t know if you’d cheat on her, I don’t know what type of man you are, I just know what type of lover you are.’ He looked down and then stood up. She thought he would cheat on his girlfriend for her. She believed he was a cheater. Something he despised wholeheartedly, she assumed was he – he thought of replying to her, but all of a sudden didn’t have the energy. The thoughts of his girlfriend sleeping with his best friend came flashing back into his mind, ladies he thought. They were stress, work and too much to handle – he turned and walked into his room trying to forget what his girlfriend had done to him, and what Kaitlin had assumed of him.

 

She’d insulted him, he hadn’t even replied to her, he just walked to his room and didn’t turn around. She knew she shouldn’t have said what was truly on her mind, but his stare demanded so much truth she just came out with it. She sighed and thought about getting her stuff and leaving, but something stopped her leg from functioning, at least make things right before leaving she thought. She stood up, fastened the towel around her and walked to his room. There he sat, on the edge of his bed, eyes closed and face pained, something was up – and it was her statement that had triggered those feelings. She slowly approached him and sat beside him thinking of the right words to say, but couldn’t think of anything. She took a deep breath and looked at him, trying to find the words to formulate, but when his eyes were still closed she decided to stay quiet. She didn’t want to worsen the situation, so instead she chose to remain silent, until he was ready to talk, she swore to herself she’d be there until he was ready.

 

He knew she was beside him, but he wasn’t too sure what she was doing, he wasn’t sure whether she was gathering her clothes or whether she was going to speak. But what he did know was that she hadn’t moved, she’d sat beside him in silence, waiting for what, was something he wasn’t sure of yet. He wasn’t a cheater, and the coincidence of being called a cheater so recently after his girlfriend cheated on him had taken him back. Brought memories back into his mind that had taken weeks and many ladies to suppress, but one comment had the wounds fresh as the first day it was made. He slowly opened his eyes and looked at Kaitlin who’d sat there watching him, in silence, taking in his facial features, his jaw line, his nose, his eyelashes…he was a handsome man, she couldn’t deny that fact.

‘I don’t have a girlfriend…anymore. I’m single, and I wouldn’t cheat on any of my partners. I’m a loyal man, and cheating is for those who are greedy and unsure of what they want in life.’ He’d been hurt, that was evident, it was written all over his face as he spoke, she didn’t mean to insinuate that he wasn’t a faithful man, she just didn’t know much about him, which was something she planned to do – know more of him.

‘I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to insinuate that you weren’t faithful, I just didn’t know what kind of man you were, I’m sorry – I shouldn’t have assumed.’ He looked at her and smiled, he knew their lack of knowledge of each other would have them assuming things, it just would take time, it’s just a shame her first assumption brought up dark memories.

‘I understand, you don’t know much about me, and likewise with you. But I’m willing to know more about Kaitlin, and I’m happy for you to know more about me.’

 

He stroked her face making her smile, she was prepared to get to know him, even though it wasn’t in the normal way others got to know each other – but who was normal nowadays? She stared into his eyes and bit her lips; he’d become so sensual in a matter of seconds. Compared to yesterday where he was more sexual and took a more predator persona, today he was loving, trying to please her in every way, and that was another thing about this man that she loved. He brought her face close to him and laid his lips onto hers. Her breath came out ragged as he continued to kiss her, making her lips plump. He bit her bottom lip and pulled her closer to him, she smiled and moved closer. He knew how to turn her on she thought, every little thing had her body tingling, her body slowly surrendering to his touch – this was the reason why she’d keep coming back even though nothing might have made sense, this was the one thing that did. She pulled away from him and sat on top of him, so that she sat facing him. He smiled and grab a handful of hair and kissed her hard. Each kiss had her moaning, his lips danced with hers, opening up her body ever so slowly. She took off her towel and threw it to the ground, where her clothes and underwear lay. The sight of her bare-naked had him hard instantly, he ripped of his towel almost growling as he took her into his arms and in a rush put her on his bed. He climbed on top of her and gave her his wolfish grin and put his manhood inside her. She moaned his name of her lips and grabbed his neck and he continued to ride her.

 

The feel of him move inside her had her almost at her climax. The way his hips moved in perfect rhythm to her own, giving him full access to her most private and intimate place had her walls contract around him. She was surprised, Lyle had only ventured within the depths of her three times, yet it seemed that he knew his way around her body. The feeling of him slamming himself into her, then almost pulling himself out, teasing her, to then again slam back into her had her womanhood dripping. Her legs began quivering, it was happening – the same pleasure she experienced during their bathroom encounter began surging through her body. From her toes to her chest, the growing pleasure continued to ripple through her slender body, the sensation almost too much for her to bare as her back arched to suppress the feeling. As she took each breath she felt the pleasure build, it had her core drip of ecstasy and had her lips parted for some sort of release. He could feel her walls convulse around his manhood. She was close to her eruption and so was he. Each motioned had him close to his goal, the way her lips parted and her body began trembling under his control had him shaking to his climax. The view of her body under his made his mouth water – her erected nipples standing on point, and the small sweat beads on her forehead told him that the way he was devouring her body was exactly what he needed to do in order to never haver her doubting him again. She could feel his hips stiffen, and her pleasure was at its peak, it was time for them to both climax. She began moving her hips on him, timing herself so that their hips came together simultaneously and then parted at the same time. Each movement she made had him clinging onto the edge of his sanity. ‘She’s trying to kill me…’ Lyle tried to compose himself but she was forcing him to cum, no matter how much he tried to hold himself back, she brought herself closer to him, so that their bodies danced together. She moved faster and faster, until the indulgence within her chest broke, making her shudder and crumble under his touch. As she shook in pleasure, he came, his back hunching as he poured his love juices into her – he couldn’t help but swear, this eruption was powerful, so powerful it had begun to take his energy. He moaned and gently collapsed on top of her, then slowly rolled beside her.

The room was silent, the only noise was their heavy breathing, he looked at her and realised she was still shaking from her climax. It was just as powerful for her as it was for him. She swore she couldn’t feel her legs, they felt numb, and her arms were heavy. She smiled and took a deep breath, feeling herself sleep into a peaceful slumber.

Hayley’s Story -Part 2

I woke up in my bed the following morning. I had no recollection of how I got there or what happened to me when that woman drove me home, but I couldn’t help but be annoyed with myself. I acted irrationally and it could have ended completely different if that woman wasn’t as nice as she was. I took a deep breath and thought about telling Veronica, but after contemplating about that option for a minute or two, I realised telling Veronica is a bad idea. I already have a headache, I didn’t need her telling me off on top of that.

I looked at my watch and saw I was only 20 minutes late in waking up for work. If I rushed and drove fast, I’d probably still make it on time. But who was I kidding? I wasn’t going to work today. With the constant thumping in my head, and the nauseous feeling that began rolling in the pit of my stomach, going to work was just a mere dream. I laid my head back into my pillow and sighed – never will I drink on a weekday again…said the alcoholic. I blindly  reached for my phone on the bedside table to call my boss telling him I won’t be able to come in today when my phone rang. I sat up again, groaning at the way my stomach felt from the fast movement and answered the phone.

“Hello?”
“Hayley! Are you awake? Wait what’s the time – you should be awake by now.” What was my boss doing calling me at 7 in the morning.
“Nick I was just about to call you.”
“No Hayley! Save it! I need you in today, there’s some clients that I need you to meet.”
“Nick, I feel like shit. I really don’t know any miracles that would help prepare me for any type of meeting today.”
“Hayley, I need you in.”
“But Nick, I’ve helped you with so many things!”
“Like what Hayley?”
“That time you needed me to write up those reports, the other time you begged me to take the Harrison Brothers out for dinner because they were investing loads of money into the company. That’s just the tip of the iceberg.”
He sighed. “Look Hayley, the meeting is at 1’oclock. Get in for 12 and I’ll let you leave after the meeting. That’s the best I can do.”

I rolled my eyes and sighed. Nick and I were a duo. I was almost his limbs and without me, sometimes he’d be lost. And without him, I wouldn’t have a job, that paid well. We understood each other very well, and he was eager to build me up through the company, which I appreciated. However, days like now, when I was hanging from my ass, I couldn’t be bothered. But because of what I knew Nick had and would do for me, caused me to have a soft spot for him.
“I’ll be there for 12:30PM.”
“Hayley!” He growled.
“Alright! I’ll be there for 12. Thanks Nick.”
“It’s fine. You owe me.” And with that the phone cut. I guess I wasn’t going to get a lay in like I would have liked, so I trudged slowly to the bathroom and ran a warm bath. I didn’t have to leave until 11Am. So I had time to shake this hangover off.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I had managed to shake off some of the hangover, not all of it, but most of it which was better than nothing. I’d worn my navy pencil skirt and white shirt with the matching blazer, knowing this meeting was a big deal if Nick decided to call me in the bloody AM for it. As I drove to work I couldn’t help but remember being slumped in the passenger seat the night before. I thought I’d slept, but images of me giggling and talking flashed in my mind. The memory was faint, but I do vaguely remember having some sort of conversation with that woman who drove me home. I remember dropping keys and her picking them up, but then everything faded.

I slammed my foot on the brakes as the lights turned red. With the way I was today, I couldn’t do anything but focus on one thing at a time. Which meant if I was driving, then that was all I could do. I couldn’t try to recollect of the events that happened the previous night, because that was way too much for my brain today.

Once Nick had briefed me on who was coming today, I finally understood why it meant so much for me to attend the meeting. It was the owners of Harriet&Co. One of the most popular upcoming businesses currently in the industry. And somehow, Nick had managed to get them interested in his future business plans and had let them know how much profit he could deliver to the company and how much they could save. Obviously after hearing profit and save, they were on board, so it was me that had to set up the meeting room, take notes and also explain our plans for the next 6 months.

It wasn’t a hard task as I’ve done this multiple times now, however, when I thought about how big of deal this was to Nick, I started to feel nervous. I wasn’t too sure whether it was still the alcohol in my system or the fact that I knew I couldn’t mess this up. Whichever one it was, it was messing me up and my stomach.
“Hayley, they’re on their way. Is everything ready?”
“Presentation is sorted, I’ve got my laptop to take notes, and the business structure for the next 6 months and previous 6 months are all printed and included in the slides.”
He smiled and nodded slightly. “That’s my girl.”

Just as we’d finished prepping, he received a call.
“Okay Hayley they’re here. Get Karen to bring some complimentary snacks in here and water and I’ll bring them up.”
I nodded and he was out before I finished nodding. I called Karen, asking for some food to be brought up here immediately and took a deep breath. It was time to get my game face on. I quickly put my phone on silent and threw it back in my bag when I noticed a white piece of paper neatly folded in my bag. I wasn’t too sure whether that was there before or maybe I just missed it earlier. I looked at the door and noticed no one was there yet. I reached for it and unfolded it.

Hi Stranger,

Is it bad that I didn’t catch your name? Sorry about that, but I do hope you’re feeling better. You was very friendly tonight, but that’s okay – it made me laugh. I hope you didn’t have to go into work, you looked shattered when you finally got home. 

I had to carry you to your bed which wasn’t easy. Carrying a drunk woman to her bed, whilst she’s undressing in your arms was really tough. I do hope you’re okay. I left my number below. Call me when you have a chance, you do kind of owe me now, right?

07473829574 – Melanie x

What in the world?! I must be dreaming, she left me a note. I am an absolute mess. I couldn’t even bare to read the note again. I couldn’t believe I was that much of a wreck that I couldn’t take myself to my own bed. This is beyond embarrassing. I guess I do owe her, but can I really see myself meeting up with her again? And live through that embarrassment, I’m not too sure.

A cough appeared from the doorway. I looked up and there stood Nick and the operational manager and CEO of Harriet@Co standing in the door way. Nick’s eyebrows were hunched with concern. I scrunched the paper into a ball and plastered a smile on my face. I walked towards the men, whilst throwing the paper in the bin on the way to them and outstretched my hand to the men.
“Pleasure to meet you, I’m Hayley.”
“Ah! Hello Hayley, I’m Simon and this is Conor, lovely to meet you.”
“Have a seat fellas, get comfortable.” Nick ushered them to their appointed seats as I walked to mine, noticing the food on the table. I must have been engrossed in that damn note that I didn’t even hear Lauren walk through the door and set up the table.
“Hayley, shall we begin?” Throwing the thoughts of the note that Melanie left in my bag out of my head, I returned my focus back onto the presentation and the meeting at hand.

© All Rights Reserved by Sarah E. Balogun